Letters To Myself...A Mental Note

 I often wonder what my life would look like had I not had cancer and become a runner.  Who would I be? Would I have awoken the sleeping giant of fitness enthusiast in me, or would I have continued on in the lifestyle I was existing in? I'd like to think that I would have gotten tired of being fat and unhealthy but I just don't know.  It's amazing to me that it took a life threatening disease to come to my senses and cause me to change my entire lifestyle.  

Life has a way of throwing me curve balls just when I think things are going great.  Why now? Why after all this time did this have to come to the surface iu such a painful wrenching way to my soul? Did I just not want to see the reality of what was going on?  Oh, I thought I was listening to my body speak to me, but I see now that I was not listening hard enough.  I let small pains and bits and pieces of important information come and go without even a nod in their direction.  I thought I had it all under control but I forgot two very important things, nutrition and my lack of normalcy.  Normal has never been my forte'.  I couldn't just have one thyroid disease at an early age I had to have three and I couldn't just have low Vitamin D I had to have Chronic critical low Vitamin D due to my bodies inability to process this vital nutrient.  How could I forget or rather ignore the nutrition and think everything was going to turn out alright?  

I know that all the stuff that's happening to my body will work itself out, one way or another, it's trusting in the process that has me worked up.  Giving up running my half marathon for the second time in two years has been heartbreaking, yet I know that it's what is best for my body.  Yet a small part of me wants to run it anyway, the consequences be dammed.  I won't do that though, it would be like running in the direction of danger just because I can, and frankly that's stupid. 

If I could just look back several months to my newly healed self I would tell her to focus on more than getting her mileage back up and for pity's sake take the damn vitamin D every day...and don't forget....get your protein in one way or another. I'd tell her that even though she could run long distances, maybe it wasn't the smart thing to do, and that running a half marathon would not define who she is. I'd tell her to just enjoy the shorter runs and focus on being as physically healthy as she could be.  Ah yes, hindsight...there is that!

If I could give one piece of advice to someone out there I'd tell them that nutrition is just as important as physical exercise.   We all want to be faster, better etc...but when is the cost to much.  I'm here to tell you, the cost is always too high when it comes to your body...it's the only one we get so take care of it and in the end it will take care of you.

I'm gearing up for more testing to see why I'm having this pelvic bone pain.  Is it a fracture, probably not. Could it be osteitis fibrosa?  Possibly.  Is this Thyroid cancer metastasized in the pelvic bones? We shall see! All I know is I'm in horrible bone jarring pain and cannot run nor can I sit or stand for long before I'm relegated to laying on a heating pad in bed, which is every day by mid morning.  This is not the life I envisioned while getting healthy, yet it is the life I live and I'll find joy however and wherever I can because it could always be worse.  I am blessed beyond measure and I am so very thankful for each and every blessing in my life.  That includes all you lovely people from the blog-o-sphere that have become my friends.  

Blessings and hugs, here is what has become my new hobby now that I have so much free time to just laze around...LOL enjoy! I call my new hobby Cloudy Thoughts Photography...What say you?

"Limitations only exist if you let them"

Godspeed...this comes from the Middle English expression "God spede (you)", a wish for success and fortune for one setting out on an enterprise, voyage, adventure, or travels. It may also mean good luck.

© 2013 Shannon M. King. This publication is the exclusive property of Shannon M. King and is protected under the US Copyright Act of 1976 and all other applicable international, federal, state and local laws. The contents of this post/story may not be reproduced as a whole or in part, by any means whatsoever, without consent of the author, Shannon M. King. All rights reserved.